The Meeting

These are the major events surrounding the time Jeromy and I met and fell in love. The official "collision", which we like to call it. 'Meant to be' is an understatement! Here - take this tissue.

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Back at the end of September (2005) I was in the process of looking for a church to attend during my stay in Maryland as a nanny. Don't ask me how but while playing around on Myspace (which we both never even use anymore!) I noticed Jeromy's page and that he was from Lexington Park, MD (just a couple miles down the road). His page was highly Christian, mentioning some of the books he likes to read and all that (which included specific books of the Bible and other Christian authors). I had just recently visited Lexington Park Baptist Church, and shot him a short email to ask if he was familiar with it, or if he knew of any other good churches in the area. Turns out he used to attend that church, and it was crazy because I later found out that he used to attend Bible study with some Christian girls I met at St. Mary's College (the ones who invited me to the campus ministry bonfire!). In fact, they even invited me to that same Bible study, and I never went. That means, had I accepted the invitation and attended the Bible study, I would have met Jeromy earlier than I did! Crazy... But who cares--we met anyhow!

After that we emailed back and forth for a couple weeks, talking about John Piper and Calvinism (4.5 vs. 5-point and all that), just a friendly conversation about a bunch of theological stuff. He asked me if I knew Piper since I'm from Minnesota, and I told him yes, and that I even visited Piper's church just before coming out here to Maryland! I even forwarded the notes on his sermon because I thought Jeromy might be interested. And then, since I was reading Captivating by John Eldredge, and I found out he was into Wild at Heart by the same author, we started talking about some of those issues.

The next week when I was in Charlotte, NC with the Cecils, Jeromy sent me a message that simply said, "When are you coming back to Southern Maryland so we can actually meet???" I was kind of taken aback, but laughed it off a little bit. My mind was kind of distracted elsewhere at the moment. Meeting Jeromy was the most random thing that had happened to me so far while in Maryland. It turns out, however, that my distraction was a good thing, or I might have been tempted to go after Jeromy, to pursue him instead of allowing God to lead him to pursue me. It was all perfect timing, the way it worked out.

I really wasn't seeking anything with Jeromy. In fact, I just about turned him down when he asked if I'd like to meet up with him and some of his friends at the Coffee Quarter one Friday night (October 21st). I just didn't want to go. And I don't know why. But at the last minute I decided, why not? I ought to make some friends so I don't end up a hermit all year! And actually, that night we didn't get to talk very much at the coffee shop because there was this jazz group from the College of Southern Maryland performing, and they were pretty loud. But afterward we went outside and with one of his friends and spent some time talking. Just nice and light. Yet even then I caught the vibe that Jeromy and I were on the same page spiritually. He walked me to my car, and it started to rain. And we just stood there and talked some more--in the rain!!

I didn't email Jeromy after that. I didn't even hear from him until the following Friday (October 28th), when he called me at about 6 pm, asking if I'd like to go to Panera Bread and then catch some ice cream at Cold Stone. I had just come in from a run, and I had almost passed out on the couch when he called. He gave me all of 15 minutes to freshen up (thanks, Jer!), and he was at the door! Talk about short notice! But it was fine, and we ended up talking nonstop again. I almost didn't even want to take a bite of food because then we'd have to pause the conversation--it was unbelievable!

I believe the next time we got together was Sunday afternoon, two days after Panera Bread (October 30th). By this time I knew something was UP with this guy. Again, he called me last minute, about an hour after church, and he drove us around to all these fun little nooks in St. Mary's County. Little known parks and beaches, lighthouses, docks...they all had beautiful views! Our last stop was Piney Point Lighthouse. Piney Point would soon become "our spot".

By that time it had grown dark, and the sky was bright. A million stars. We walked to the end of the dock and just stood there for probably an hour and a half, just marveling in wonder at the things of God. We never talked about this friendship we had formed, or whether we wanted to be more than friends. It was ALL about God. That night was magic, and we both knew it. God was doing something here, but we didn't have a clue where that would lead. All of that was yet unsaid.

I think we ate out one more time before the missions banquet with the Potomac Baptist Association. It was weird. He called me Monday night (October 31st), just after I hung up with the Association office to make a reservation so I could attend the banquet. There was no way I was going to invite Jeromy. I don't ask guys out, period. But when he called I said that I just finished making reservations for the banquet, he immediately responded with, "Oh yeah, that sounds cool!" He said it as if I made a reservation for TWO--me AND him! I didn't know what to say! It was awkward, but at the same time it wasn't! So I just played along, "You mean you would like to go?" There went God again...appointing things out of my control! I almost laughed out loud!

So yes, Jeromy went to the banquet with me the following Thursday (November 4th). And I paid! (*gasp*) The speaker at the missions banquet was Carrie McDonnall, lone survivor of an Iraqi insurgent attack back in March of '04. She, her husband, and two other individuals were missionaries over in Iraq, and they all perished except for Carrie, despite the fact she was wounded over 22 times. 22 TIMES!!! Most people are dead with ONE bullet! This woman is definitely a recipient of God's mercy. God has a message for her to share with the world. And share she did!

Recently we joked about how the seating at our table was pretty cozy, and despite no other physical contact up to that point, we were forced to rest our leg against the other's! The previous week I sent Jeromy an email with just one word: "integrity", because I was so impressed with how honorably and selflessly he treated me at all times. I was beginning to grasp the importance of communicating more specifically when he wrote back and asked, "Is that to say I have it or need it?" :)

After the banquet Jeromy drove me back to the Cecils, but we stayed in the truck and talked for at least another hour. It was good. Then I realized I had decided not to bring my purse, and that my house key was locked inside! It was after 11 by then, and to my dismay I ended up waking both Mike and Chris, AND Samantha--who was screaming once they let me in the house. And THEN the security alarm went off, and...it was a mess. So I said a quick goodbye to Jeromy and went straight up to my bedroom. I felt horrible and embarrassed and I wanted to hide.

I wasn't tired, though, so I emailed a "thank-you-but-sorry-for-the-incident" message, and then when I clicked send, I noticed Jeromy had sent me a message at the same time! We were both too wired to sleep, so we hopped on MSN messenger and chatted for...a few more hours! As it were, Jeromy decided to just lay it all out there, and he commented about how amazing it has been to meet someone like me who wants to talk about the things of God. He said he had to wear his heart on his sleeve and take a risk with me. It took us until 2:30 in the morning to finish that conversation! We will never forget that night/wee morning.

Near the beginning I had feared taking it further than friendship because I had never before experienced such a spiritual connection to somebody so quickly in all my life. From the start it was obvious that this was NOT about Jeromy and Tara. This was about GOD. All I could do was just pray that it would ALWAYS be about God. But I was still scared because I DID want more, and God had to show me that that didn't have to be a bad thing. For the first time it wasn't ME striving. I wasn't seeking anything. It was frightening because it WAS (and IS) totally out of my control. There were Hands greater than mine at work here. It was so real I could feel it. And the last thing I wanted to do was to dishonor that sacredness. I didn't want this God-focus to all of a sudden make this selfish shift so that it became about Jeromy and Tara. The thought haunted me. So I didn't say a word. And then I was struck with one thought: Well, if it be in the mind of God Almighty, then what if, perhaps one day it just might be more about GOD if it were more about Jeromy and Tara? MORE sacred. And the fear absolutely crumbled. It dissolved. And yet I still didn't say a word. I've learned enough in my day (the hard way, always!) to let the guy be the pursuer. I don't want to rob a guy of that glory, nor do I want to rob myself of a potentially incredible story. So I just waited. But surprisingly, it wasn't hard! And then, that night God opened Jeromy's mouth, and there you have it...a collision. An amazing whirlwind of a collision that still causes me to rub my eyes in the middle of the day, wondering if this is real. (Pinching hurts, so I stopped that!) And it IS real. And we covet that sacredness. We may have to fight for it at times, but it is every bit worth the fight.

We could hardly wait until daylight, because we planned to meet for breakfast. We stopped at the store to pick up some bagels and sat at the Piney Point dock again. Jeromy brought his guitar and we sang praise songs toward the horizon and prayed some. Perfection....

The rest is history, I guess. October 21st and November 5th are two quite special days for us. And soon to come, August 12th!

See also: Engaged!, Our Wedding Vows, and Jeromy